Three Decisions That Changed My Life
Looking back, it's strange how often life-changing moments don't feel life-changing at the time.
They feel like a phone call.
Or a cancelled holiday.
Or a conversation over a cup of tea.
All three of them are part of the same story. Together, they explain how I ended up moving to Thailand for a year and writing my first novel Thai Die.
The Phone Call
In July 2002, I was living what most people would consider a pretty ordinary life. I was working in IT, commuting into London every day and following a path that seemed sensible and predictable.
Then the phone rang.
It was Jim, a friend of my ex-boyfriend Paul. Paul had been involved in a serious motorbike accident in Thailand. We'd broken up years earlier, but we'd remained close friends. When I finally managed to speak to him, he sounded frightened, isolated and depressed. He had a badly injured hand that wasn't healing properly and was facing yet another procedure to remove infected tissue.
The idea of travelling to Asia alone terrified me. In fact, Asia had never even featured on my list of places I particularly wanted to visit. But three days later I was booking a flight.
I packed natural remedies, guitar strings he'd asked for and anything else I thought might help, then boarded a plane on my own.
Most people think the remarkable part of that story is flying halfway around the world at short notice. For me, the remarkable part is much simpler. Sometimes people need someone. And when somebody matters to you, labels like "ex-boyfriend" become far less important than simply being there.
The Cancelled Holiday
I spent two weeks in Thailand helping Paul recover, then returned home and carried on with life. A couple of months later, another unexpected event occurred.
I'd booked what was supposed to be the trip of a lifetime: a safari in Zimbabwe. Then political problems in the country escalated and the trip was cancelled shortly before I was due to leave. At the time, I was gutted. I'd planned it for ages. I'd looked forward to it. I'd imagined exactly how it would unfold. But I already had the leave booked. So rather than sit at home feeling sorry for myself, I booked another two weeks in Thailand.
Paul was fully recovered by then. I met up with friends I'd made during my first trip and spent two fantastic weeks enjoying island life.
Then, towards the end of the holiday, a single conversation with Muig the owner of Charm Beach Resort on Koh Pha Ngan changed everything for me.
Muig had a dream of having a business, a pony trekking business into the jungle on Koh Pha Ngan. But he was also the headmaster of the school. He didn't have the time and he wanted someone to run it with him, an English speaking someone.
At first it sounded like one of those conversations people have on holiday. But Muig was serious in asking me and a plan formed. What if I actually did it? What if I stepped completely off the path I was on and tried something totally different?
When I flew home a few days later, the plan came home with me.
The Hardest Decision
People often assume the difficult part was what came next.
Giving up my job.
Renting out my house.
Selling my car.
Moving to a country I'd never expected to live in.
Starting a business on the other side of the world.
None of those things were the hardest part.
The hardest part was my dad. My father had lymphoma. Doctors had given him a five-year prognosis and we were only around halfway through that journey. The thought of leaving for a year felt impossible. It felt selfish. It felt wrong. I seriously considered the idea then abandoning it as the timing wasn't right.
But my dad had other ideas. He'd always encouraged me to step outside of my comfort zone and this was no different. He told me, "Opportunities like this are once in a lifetime. Take every one you can." So after a lot of discussion and agreement to come home for a two week holiday with him, I did it.
In the final weeks of 2002, I resigned from my IT job, rented out my flat, sold my car and prepared for a completely different life. Then, on New Year's Eve 2002, I arrived in Thailand to begin what was supposed to be a one-year adventure.
Looking Back
When I look back now, I realise none of these stories are really about Thailand. They're about saying yes.
Yes to helping somebody who needed me.
Yes to travelling somewhere that scared me.
Yes to a replacement holiday when the original dream fell apart.
Yes to an unexpected opportunity.
And yes to taking a chance when staying put would have been much easier.
A phone call led to a two-week trip.
A cancelled holiday led to another two-week trip.
A conversation on that trip led to a completely different life.
At the time, each decision felt separate. Only years later can I see how perfectly they linked together. One led to the next. And without any of them, I doubt I'd have ended up in Thailand at all.
Before I arrived in Thailand for that year, I thought I was taking a temporary break from my old life and starting a new business. Instead, I found myself navigating unexpected challenges and eventually writing my first novel as it all unfolded around me. Those real-life twists and turns became Thai Die, while the true story behind that extraordinary year is told in Thai Die: How a Year in Thailand Turned into a Thriller Novel.
Real places. Real experiences. Real stories.
Next week: What real experiences in that year in Thailand made it into the novel.
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